It's been a long time. I'm surprised to find more than a year has passed since I last posted my blog. So much has changed since then, and to my surprise, I'm content with what I am now. I had decided to quit my study for the time being on various grounds. I was short of money. I also wanted to distance myself from my supervisor. Though she still tries to get me back to my study, I receive her encouragement with mixed feelings. When I think back to the days spent with her, it was really horrible. I found that one needs something other than creativity and aspiration in order to be successful in this field. I was unsure of my future prospect in the world of so-called academism. As I was exhausted and had shown symptoms of depression, I decided to free myself from my stubborn obsession that "Once I had started it, I must make something out of it."
Now I devote myself exclusively to what I used to do in my spare time: teaching job. The last fifteen months have been full of tremendous stress but certainly not without joy and laughter. I feel responsible for guiding them, which sometimes puts so much pressure on me. Nonetheless, I don't feel like quitting because it comes always with a sense of accomplishment and pleasure of seeing their smiles.